Thursday, April 22, 2010

I HAD A RELATIONSHIP WITH A MAN, AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW HIS NAME

I finally decided to finish some of the planned projects I had a year ago before I decided I was going to move. One of those projects was the bathroom by my daughter's bedroom. I headed to Home Depot last night right after work to 'color match' a piece that was in the bathroom for an accent color. I arrived in the paint area and there was a man at the counter in front of me. He was just waiting for his paint to mix, so he stepped aside so I could be waited on.

They matched the color I brought in and I assumed the waiting position as well. The man next to me... who I will say was a very good looking man.... started to talk to me about paint colors and the conversation evolved into what he was currently working on, and the fact he would be spending his evening painting the same wall for the fourth time in order to try and get the color correct. We continued on about household projects when he presented me with the following offer: "If you come to my house and paint my wall, I will come to your house and watch you paint". It was a tremendous offer. Such benefits... for him. So, I thanked him for the generous offer and asked that he clarify what the up side was for me. "Would you entertain me while I worked? Sing? Dance?" He revealed his ability to dance and inability to sing, and spoke of his ability to be a conversationalist and in times of great need, his ability to even listen if he had to. He mentioned he even knew how to cook. He got me there. Excellent, so if I paint, you will cook me dinner. No. He said he 'could' not would'. I was still intrigued so asked what he 'could' cook if he 'would'. Salmon? No, I don't do seafood. Steak? Yes, steak would work. I asked what else he had. He mentioned his taking a massage class in college, then quickly withdrew and mentioned that may be too much information for someone he has just met.

About this time the Home Depot worker looked up from his work and inquired if he was sensing a romance brewing here. The man's face turned a color somewhere in between the color he was getting and the color I was getting, then acknowledged that now it was just plain awkward. To which I replied that this is the best relationship I'd ever had. No drama, no false expectations. He continued my list agreeing, no 'where's my engagement ring'. About this time his paint was done mixing and was ready to go. He grabbed his paint and was off. I coyly looked at the Home Depot guy and said, "I just had a relationship with a man, and I didn't even know his name."

The man overheard my statement, made an 180 degree turn and returned to introduce himself. Mike.

(Just to eliminate the need for any questions about our next encounter... let me just clarify.... I am not so smooth in these situations. His first name is all I got. No number. No last name. This was sadly the end of our relationship... not the beginning)

3 comments:

  1. Great idea! Love seeing a creative mind work and gain success!!!!!! Hope it continues to grow!

    regards.
    http://www.mayfairstationers.co.uk

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  2. What fun! I love that kind of silliness/witty-ness! (I think I just made up a word there.)

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  3. Chaudhary... You make it sound like I plotted for this to happen. hmmmm... if only I was able to plot out such encounters... I wouldn't have to keep going back to Home Depot just to see if I run in to him again with failure every time.

    Kathie - keep making up words... I like them. Maybe I should start a glossary on here.

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