Tuesday, June 29, 2010


I am off to the dentist today. I have been at the dentist every week, sometimes a couple times a week, for the past six or seven weeks. I like the guy and all... he is even my neighbor... but I have seen way too much of him and I would like to take a break.

It is my own fault. I had dental work from seven years ago that I had not taken care of. I couldn't believe it when they told me I hadn't been there since 2003! How did SEVEN years pass without me realizing it? But, thinking about it... 2004 - Diagnosis. 2005 - Death. 2006-2009 - Surviving. 2010 - Trying to thrive. Yes, it HAS been seven years!!

So many years spent in survival mode, and dealing with REAL health issues - my teeth have been largely ignored. So, now I am paying the price. Physically and financially.

Two years ago I realized I had not been to my gynecologist in a while. I called to make an appointment. They requested my name. And then informed me that I was not in their system, so they would need to set me up as a new patient. I petitioned with the sweet lady that she must be mistaken. I have three children. All delivered by doctors in that office. I have been going there for fourteen years.

"When was the last time you were here?"

"Um... well, probably three or four years ago. Things have been pretty crazy here."

"That explains it. After three years of inactivity, we retire records"

"What? My medical history is gone - just like that?? Just because I have not made it there?"

I guess so.

I showed up the day of my appointment, filled out all the 'new patient' paperwork and did the standard wait, wait, wait.

When the doctor walked in (the same doctor that delivered two of my three children), he introduced himself and started in on some "let's get to know my new patient" chat.

I didn't respond. I just looked at him. Squinted my eyes and said, "we have met before".

I think it was a look of relief, and he commented that he thought we had - but where? He could even recount that he knew the town I lived in... but couldn't put the pieces together.

I then proceeded to tell him that he delivered two of my children. I think he was a tad embarrassed then, but also confused, and at the same time remembered who I was and remembered my husband and deliveries. "Why does your chart say you are a new patient?"

"Hey, it's your office, not mine. You tell me."

Lesson Manual: How to be a Widow
9. Don't forget the basics of living. Make your doctor, dentist, mammogram, colonoscopy and any other appointments you should have. Time will go by too quickly and you will have enough other things to worry about, let alone your health if you don't take care of it.


  1. Women always put themselves last! I'm so glad that you are taking care of you! <3

  2. It is a bad habit that too many women fall into! Widowed or not. So, do it now... start callin' those doctors and make some appointments.