Friday, July 9, 2010

THE WEDDING - I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO THINK

No, I didn't skip ahead in the story... It just so happens that it all started to change at a wedding.

I wrote in my diary the day after "Yesterday (Saturday) was one of the most confusing days of my life... Let me explain: Chris picked me up around 11:30 - things were normal. The wedding was at 2:00 - things were different. I didn't know what or how, I could just tell they were different."

The wedding was my first Catholic experience. Up, down, up, down. When I was down, in my youthful ways, I was playing with the little clip that holds something on the back of the pew. Do you know what I am talking about? Well, I was messing with it until I accidentally let it slip and the church was very quiet until that snap echoed throughout. I, of course, nonchalantly looked around the room wondering who was so rude to be making noise like that during the ceremony. Up, down, up, down. When I was up, Chris would put his hand on my waist. What was that? odd. But, I liked it. It felt good. I squeezed his hand with my elbow. Who would have known that a little squeeze like that was all Chris needed?

When the wedding was over we started to walk out of the church and he took my hand. OK, I am young and often in youth you can over-react to any physical touch. This can be totally justified. He is just trying to lead me around and not lose me in a crowd of people, right? Just to be safe, I sat on my hands when we got in the car.

Aladdin at the movie theatre was next on our list. OK. Now there is no justifying physical touch in the movie theater. I am sitting next to him. Unless he just wanted to reach over and make sure I was still there. But, then you just have to reach out and poke... not keep touching. What was he doing? Diary entry: "I finally had to admit something??? was going on. I was scared to death???? I don't know why, but it just kept going through my mind how scared I was."

The remainder of the day, I tried to keep my physical distance. I couldn't take this. My mind was spinning. Luckily, I had to be home by midnight - so we eventually headed that direction. "All the way home I kept thinking about all of it - but I didn't know what to think. I had never thought about this happening - so I didn't know WHAT I thought of it all. When we got closer to my home he said, 'What do you think of this?' I, of course, had NO idea. We talked for a short while about it, then the subject changed. We drove around for a little. We got to my house around 11:45. I came inside about 12:45. We sat outside in his car just talking about all of this. We didn't really decide on anything 'cause I didn't know what to think - but he kissed me a few times, so I really don't know what to think."

4 comments:

  1. You sat on your hands? Too funny.

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  2. Yes. It seemed to be the safest thing to do.

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  3. Just catching up, watched "The Notebook" which came a few days ago - quite a backdrop as you reminisce your own experience. Have you received "Zarahemla" yet?

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  4. Zarahemla... ummm.. that would require me making it to the post office... I'll let you know! :)

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