5 YEARS LATER

I was 29. I was in love. I was widowed.

I have moved three times in the last five years... that story is for another day... but somehow, even though my husband's name isn't on anything anymore, the magazine "This Old House" has managed to keep up with me and where I live. I received a letter from them this week. It was addressed to my husband with big bold letters across the front that said, "We Want You Back". I thought...SO DO I!

It has been five years now. Five years ago today I stood in a hospital knowing I was saying goodbye, at least for this life. That was nothing compared to watching my husband say goodbye to our children. I sobbed.

It has been a journey. I have grown. I have cried. But I have come to love this path for the strength it has instilled in me, for the perspective I have gained.

I did a lot of "coming out of the clouds" this year. Don't get me wrong, it is still hard. I am still tired. I still miss him. But I am starting to find me again.... Although, sometimes, like yesterday and today, I feel like I am in a maze and I can't seem to find my way out. I just keep running into walls.

This blog is about widowhood. About the path I have been on and about the path that is coming. If you are a widow, I hope you will come here to find out you aren't crazy.... OK, maybe we are all a little crazy. But that is what makes us.. us! Welcome to the Diary of a Widow!