Thursday, August 5, 2010


I have learned a lot of compassion over the past several years. Being a widow has allowed me to understand single moms, widows of all ages, and people who are single better than I ever have. But, there have been my moments that I have been truly lacking in compassion.

One day within the first couple months after Chris' death I showed up to work ready to go as the day was full of appointments and much to accomplish. I had to get out of the gates running so to speak. There was another girl that I would be spending the day with who would be assisting me in our work for the day.

She was already at work when I walked in, but, she wasn't even close to working yet. She was sitting at her desk crying. I was compassionate at first... inquiring if everything was OK. She proceeded to tell me that she was using confidential company information (that she never should have been looking at) to determine that a friend of hers was dating an ex-boyfriend of hers.

I will stop the story here to say this is one of those things I just don't get. Can someone explain why, if YOU break up with a guy... why do you CARE if that guy dates one of your friends?? I don't get it. Anyone is welcome to date any of the guys I have. There is a reason why I am not dating them.. So, go for it. I can see it being more difficult if HE broke up with you... But when YOU break it off.. LET GO!

Anyhow... I let her cry for a bit while I prepped all the material for our meetings. We were running out of time, and would need to leave the office soon. She was still sitting in the corner crying (and had added texting her girlfriend to her list of activities for the morning). I was growing irritated. We still had to load the vehicle with things we would need for the day. I kindly told her she needed to help me out. She began sobbing.

I looked at her with irritation and said, "Listen, my HUSBAND just died and I am managing to pull it together enough to work. I am certain you can do the same with your situation."

It worked. She pulled herself together.

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